"Now, as I was saying before I was so RUDELY interrupted," Ash continued. "I don't 
really care what you think about me. However, that doesn't mean I'm not pissed 
about all the things you say about us and all the things you do to us, because I 
am. I am so boiling mad at you, it's not even funny! So now it's your turn, 
little missy. You're going to sit there, you're going to keep your hands to 
yourself and your mouth shut, and you're going to listen while I tell you 
exactly what I think of you!" 

She crossed her arms and snorted again. "My names's not Missy, it's Cori," Ash 
heard her grumble under her breath. 

"You, Cori, have got to be, without a doubt, one of the most whiny, 
inconsiderate, petty, spiteful, conceited, vindictive, hypocritical bitches I've 
ever had the misfortune of meeting!" Ash told her, ignoring the snotty remark. 

Cori looked up at me with an expression of utter shock, as if he'd just slapped 
her across the face. 

"Why are you so surprised?" Ash asked. "All you've ever done since the day you met 
us is give us trouble. What did you expect? That I'd like you, or something?!" 

She turned away from me. 

"I can't count the number of times you and Shigeru1313 have left us in dire straits. My 
friends and I have ALWAYS helped you in life-or-death situations! We can set 
aside our differences and work together with you when it really matters, but 
when the tables are turned, more often than not, you don't give a shit whether 
we live or die...." 

"That's a lie!" Cori cried, jumping to her feet. "We've saved your slimy lives 
on more than one occasion...and it was more than you deserved!" 

Ash rolled his eyes. "Now this is exactly what I'm talking about. I didn't say you've 
never helped us. I'm just saying that the rare occasions when you actually do 
give us a hand don't make up for all of the times you've hurt us or left us to 
die. And you're always such wankers about it when you are bothered to help us! 
You're always passing judgement on us and acting like you did some big, heroic 
thing, lowering yourselves enough to do something nice for Team Twerp! Misty, 
Brock, and I don't gloat when we do a good turn for you, and we always thank 
you when you help us, but we never get those same courtesies in return! And by 
the way...SHUT UP!" 

She frowned and seated herself again. 

"And I can't stand how full of yourself you are," Ash continued. "For all the 
bitching you do about how vain Misty and I are, you're a million times worse! 
Always bragging about how cute you are, what a wonderful trainer you are, how 
nice you are -- you're such a little prima donna, it makes me sick! Because you 
know something? You're not any of the things you claim to be -- you're mean to 
your Psyduck, you're a total bitch to your friends...and don't even get me 
started on how bad you are when it comes to people you DON'T like! That kind of 
behavior makes you ugly, no matter how cute you think you are!" 

Cori hung her head. 

"But you know what pisses me off more than all of that combined?" Ash asked. "It's 
the way you treat Misty like shit and act like you're better than she is when 
you don't even KNOW her!" 

"I know enough," she sneered. "She's an evil, heartless witch!" 

"No!" Ash retorted. "You're just taking everything you hate about yourself and 
projecting it onto Misty! You don't know anything about her! You don't know a 
goddamned thing!" 

"Dat's right!" Brock chimed in. 

"Take the tournament at last year's Princess Festival, for example," Ash said. "I 
bet you think you beat Misty because you were a better trainer...." 

Cori stuck her tongue out at me. "I AM a better trainer! Misty's never won a 
pokemon battle against me, and neither have you, for that matter! You're BOTH 
pathetic losers!" 

Ash folded his arms across his chest and snickered. "You'd like to think that, 
wouldn't you? You really like to think that you're a better trainer than Misty 
and that you won those dolls fair and square. But let me tell you a little story 
about what REALLY happened on that day." 

She raised an eyebrow. 

"And by the way, what part of shut up don't you understand? I keep saying it, 
but you still aren't doing it!" 

She frowned again. 

"Anyway," Ash continued. "Think back on that tournament. You were using Pikachu, 
Bulbasaur, Vulpix, Starmie, and Psyduck, weren't you? A large, well-balanced 
team. And you made it all the way to the finals, too...." 

Cori gave me a haughty look, as if to confirm what he'd just said. 

"And now think about Misty. All she had were Arbok, Weezing, Lickitung, and 
Brock. Not only did she have fewer pokemon, but she had way less variety, and 
for the most part, she only used Arbok and Weezing. But you know what? She made 
it to the final round, too...and she almost beat you. Now I ask you, who's the 
better trainer? The one who makes it to the final round with a balanced team, or 
the one who makes it just as far with only two poison-types? And how, exactly, 
did your victory in the final round make you a better trainer than Misty? 
Psyduck getting a headache and blasting us off didn't have a damn thing to do 
with your skills as a trainer -- you won that tournament by a Mary Sue Plot 
Contrivance, and you know it." 

Cori sighed. 

"And what's more, you didn't even deserve to win!" Ash told her. "I heard you 
after the tournament -- you only wanted those Princess Dolls so that you could 
lord it over your sisters and make them jealous! That's a pretty damn spiteful 
reason to want something, if you ask me...." 

"You shut up!" Cori snapped. "You have no idea what it's like to have three big 
sisters who always gloat about how much prettier and more talented they are than 
you and always get all the best toys and clothes! I NEEDED to win those dolls to 
show them that I'm just as good as they are! What would YOU know about it anyway?! 
You were rich -- you always had everything handed to you on a silver platter...." 

"All the money and material possessions in the world don't make up for unloving 
parents and a life with an abusive fiance. Besides, that part of my life is over 
-- I walked away from it a long time ago. And I chose never to return to it 
because I found something better than money -- friendship," Ash replied. "But this 
isn't about me -- this is about you, and I don't need to know what it's like to 
have siblings to know that your reasons for wanting the dolls were petty and 
selfish. 

"You may have been stuck with your sisters' hand-me-downs when you were little, 
but at least you HAD good clothes and Princess Dolls!" Ash said. "Why don't you 
try having nothing?! Why don't you try having to wear rags from a thrift store 
and having other kids make fun of you and beat you up because you can't afford 
to dress like they do?! Why don't you try eating snow in the winter because 
there's nothing else TO eat?! Why don't you try having your only toy stolen from 
you on Christmas?! Try living like that for awhile and see how well you like it! 
See how well you like watching your mother accept a dangerous job because it's 
the only way she can possibly support her daughter, and all it does is send her 
to an early grave! See how friendly and well-adjusted you are when all you know 
is abandonment and abuse! Bitch about your terrible sisters and your deprived 
childhood after you've been through THAT!" 

Cori's eyes widened. "Y-you mean Misty....?" 

"That's right," Ash told her. "Misty wanted those dolls because she never had 
anything! She wanted to win so that she could finally have something...something 
that she earned and that nobody could take away from her! She didn't want to 
hurt anybody -- she wanted those dolls so that she could prove her worthiness to 
herself. You just wanted them to make your sisters jealous. Now who do you think 
deserved them more?" 

"I...I had no idea," she whispered. 

"You're damn right you had no idea!" Ash snapped. "You don't know what Misty has 
been through, so you have no right to judge her and condemn her the way you 
always do! She has been through more shit than any normal person can be expected 
to deal with! True, she has a temper, and there's times when she lashes out at 
the people she cares for, but who can blame her? Sometimes she hurts inside, but 
in spite of it all, she is still the sweetest, most gentle and loving woman I've 
ever met! You have no idea what Misty is really like -- you just see the Team 
Twerp uniform she wears and assume she's evil!" 

Cori bit her lip and turned away from me. 

"Misty is ten times the trainer you are. She's ten times the person you are. 
And she is infinitely more beautiful than you are...on the inside AND the 
outside!" 

She began to fidget when he said this. Ash knew he was really getting to her now, so 
he pressed the issue. 

"You know, I bet that's why you were such a bitch when Misty got her hair cut 
off by that Scyther," Ash remarked. "Because for all the comments you made about 
how ugly she was, she still looked better than you! Even then you couldn't hold 
a candle to her, and you just couldn't stand it, could you? So you just dealt 
with it the only way you know how -- by being insensitive!" 

Cori's face contorted in anger. Oh, yeah! he'd definitely hit a sore spot with 
her on that one -- he was on a roll! Still, no matter how good it felt to get all 
of the anger he was feeling towards her out of my system, Ash knew that he had more 
important things to do...namely, finding Misty again and working things out 
with her. So, he decided to drop one last bombshell on the brat and finish the 
job. 

"And you know what? Even when you think you're being nice, you're STILL a total 
bitch!" Ash said. 

"What the?! What's that supposed to mean?!" she cried. 

"Does the day we were out searching for Salvea Weed ring a bell?" Ash queried. 

"But I WAS being nice!" she insisted. "I shared my Salvea Weed with you! I 
helped you get the cure for Misty, and if I recall correctly, you were the ones 
who turned on me!" 

"Oh?" Ash asked. "That's funny because the way I remember it, you beat me and 
Brock up and made fun of us for trying to catch a wild pokemon! Since when is 
trying to help a sick friend a crime? Since when is it wrong to catch wild 
pokemon? Or is it only okay for you and your friends to catch pokemon? Seems 
pretty damned hypocritical if you ask me." 

"But Poliwag was afraid of you!" she said. "I had to protect him!" 

"And what made you think that?" Ash retorted. "Is it because Brock and I are Team 
Twerp? What did you do? Just look at us and assume we were up to no good?" 

"Well...yes, but I helped you when you said you just wanted some Salvea Weed for 
Misty." 

"True," Ash admitted. "But the point is, you still automatically condemned me and 
Brock before you even bothered to find out what we were doing and why we were 
doing it. If you'd just left us alone, we wouldn't have hassled you at all -- I 
would've gotten Poliwag to find some Salvea Weed, and we'd have been on our way...and 
Misty might not have gotten hurt...." 

Cori gave me a quizzical look. "Got hurt? What do you mean?" 

Ash frowned. "The Vileplume that poisoned Misty wasn't there by chance -- it 
belonged to Mistybelle. She was following us." 

Cori covered her mouth with her hand. 

"She wanted to poison me, but she got Misty instead," Ash continued. "And while 
Brock and I were out messing around with you, Mistybelle attacked her...tried 
to get rid of her and take her place so she could capture me. Misty fought back...and 
won, but it was a close match since she was so sick, and she got cut up really 
badly when Mistybelle whipped her. If I'd been there, I could've protected her, 
and we could've fought that bitch together. But because of you, I wasn't there, 
and Misty paid the price for it. She got hurt because of you...because you had 
to give me and Brock a hard time." 

"Oh...." 

"You know, I bet you didn't even check your goddamned e-mail!" Ash told her. "As 
pissed as I was at you, I still wrote a nice letter, thanking you for sharing 
your Salvea Weed with us. I even made Misty apologize for attacking you after 
we cured her! I did my best to be courteous, but after that you started acting 
even meaner! I didn't think it was possible, but you did! Seems like the nicer 
we try to be, the shittier you treat us!" 

She looked up at me again. 

"And that, Cori, is what I think of you," Ash concluded. "You're a rude, 
thoughtless, selfish person, and you make me sick. I HATE you!"